As I read the headlines or listen to the news, I can feel as if the world has turned upside down since I was a child. Values that appeared to be “the norm” often based on biblical principles could be found posted in public buildings and in public schools, not just espoused in our churches and homes. We seemed to be clearer on what we stood for and why. Somehow that felt reassuring even when those things were not perfect and shot through with our myopic humanity.

Of course, there were differing views among us back then, but we did not seem to shatter or break apart on their rocky shores. We appeared to be guided by something more than a presumed moral compass, a stronger commitment that bound us together beyond our contradictions. Perhaps some of that came from a sturdier foundation based on biblical principles.

Somewhere along the line we seemed to start reading stories we found in the Bible much as we would common fables, looking to discover the moral to this or that story. Maybe we missed the basics that the Bible is one large story rather than a collection of stories. It could be that we stopped looking at the Bible as relevant and got lost in what seemed like too many paradoxes.

It wasn’t a big leap until doubts and uncertainty about what the Bible said or did not say grew. We began to cut and paste what suited us.

But then I began to wonder if things have changed so very much. When the Lord walked the earth as both God and man, life was difficult and full of contradictions. Many were looking for a king who would set things in order. But when He arrived in a dirty stable to the mother of a peasant girl and her fiancé, no one recognized He was royalty.

Later, the religious leaders of the day were upset for the way He challenged their traditions, inconsistencies, and power structure that showed little evidences of God’s love, grace, and truth.

He talked with persons that religious leaders of the day ignored, shunned, or condemned.

He stretched His arms wide to embrace a broad cross-section of the people of His day without compromising any of the values He came to demonstrate.

And never were His arms stretched wider than on the cross that was used by those religious leaders to try to shut Him up. What a paradox! The cross, an instrument of torture, trumped their power play, confirmed His deity, and assured the insurgence they so much feared.

The cross.

There are no other religions whose symbol stands as such a contradiction.

Listen to how G.K. Chesterton describes it in Orthodoxy:

“Christianity is centrifugal: it breaks out (Buddhism is centripetal…a circle represents it.) But the cross, though it has at its heart a collision and a contradiction, can extend its four arms forever without altering its shape. Because it has a paradox in its center it can grow without changing….”

Chesterton’s perspective reminds me that even though I may not always see it, that symbol of contradiction and paradox is still breaking out in my current day.

It happened last week in Oregon when one who was intent on destruction asked students if they were Christian. It stood after the first Christian was shot in the head for that faith and others had to answer.

The horrors of the headlines push us to examine our values, our beliefs, and our foundations.

The cross brings us back to the truth while thrusting us forward to bear witness to it and remember the hope it brings and the promise it holds.

Many of us remember the story of Peter Pan and especially the movie as well as the live production aired on television a few years ago. One of the many songs Peter sings is one with the lyrics “I won’t group up”. Peter and his band of boys have many adventures, but never do they want to grow up, go to school, or be forced to do anything adults feel they should do including take responsibility.

J.M. Barrie’s story is a delightful excursion into battles with Indians, pirates, a princess, and of course the sparkling Tinkerbelle. It’s perfect for every child or child-at-heart’s imagination, but I wonder if we recognize when we also struggle with growing up.

I think I grew up being somewhat of an “old soul” whose home life was more focused on chores and responsibilities than playing games and living in a fantasy land of pirates and fairies. It probably took me into adulthood until I realized the fun and freedom of being playful. My grandchildren helped me a great deal in this area, but I still am not as free as they are.

Consequently, when I saw in the gospels that we are to become like children in our faith in Jesus, it was harder to identify what that would look like. Over time, I grew in my understanding. As I sat alone with Him in my quiet times with journal and pen in hand, He would sometimes seem to speak to me about what it might look like.

In the autumn quite a few years ago as I was journaling with the Lord about this, I sensed Him letting me know that even though I was growing in my understanding of being a child in Him I sometimes made Him into “a serious Papa” and that I needed to see Him smiling, eyes twinkling, and delighting as He did with children as He walked the earth. As a child, I would trust Him without doubting or questioning if He would be there for me.

He gave me a sense of the absolute trust a child has when a loving dad invites his child to jump into his arms. The child doesn’t question whether the dad will be there. The child believes the loving, caring, and strong daddy will always make the catch and jumps without doubting.

He seemed to give me permission to know that enjoying Him in that way did not diminish my reverence of Him if I trusted Him as such a child would do. Very clearly, my journal that day sensed these words from His heart to mine, “You’re allowed to laugh with me, dance with me, crawl into my lap and hide in the folds of garments, but you will need to learn to risk more and be more of a child with me.”

I knew He was not suggesting I be childish or irresponsible. There were battles to fight, but not with imaginary Indians and pirates. There was the need to serve selflessly rather than with self as focus as is often true of us as children.

So what would it mean to grow up while yet being a child? The best description came from C. S. Lewis in Mere Christianity. Let me share it with you.

“Christ never meant that we were to remain children in intelligence: on the contrary. He told us to be not only as ‘harmless as doves’, but also as ‘wise as serpents’. He wants a child’s heart, but a grown-up head. He wants us to be simple, single-minded, affectionate and teachable, as good children are; but He also wants every bit of intelligence we have to be alert at its job, and in first-class fighting trim.”

These words come into focus each day I sit down at my desk to write. They are etched in a glass cube given to me by a friend for a birthday not long ago. They first made an impression on me almost 25 years ago when my husband and I went to see the movie, Dead Poets Society. As time passed, the words continued to leave an imprint, nudging me to discover what that looks like for me.

What does it mean for me to “seize the day”? Various definitions given most often speak of enjoying the moment, the present, or even “plucking” the day as if it is ripe and ready for enjoyment. Some have said it means to also make the most of each day since the future is uncertain and largely unknown.

I once heard a graduation speaker say, “If you love life, do not waste time for time is what life is made of”. As a result, reflecting on the words “carpe diem” cause me to consider the speaker’s admonitions as well. It would be wonderful to tell you that I have not wasted time most days, but I can make no claim to that. As I have gotten older, I am less clear on what might be considered a “waste of time”. Too often our culture drives us to be productive and to accomplish something that translates into what the culture values at that period, but what if the culture is not what is to be the guide for my life, as I believe it is not?

Sitting watching the beauty of a sunset might be considered a waste of time by many, but if it stirs my soul to not only enjoy the beauty but also draw closer to the One who created it, is it not valuable? Taking time to read a story to a grandchild while I ignore laundry waiting to be done may not seem very productive, but is it not truly choosing the best? Pausing to be still so that I can enter into solitude and simply enjoy the Lord’s presence would be described by some as wiling away my time, but is that how He would see it? Choosing to skip a meeting to listen to a friend who needs encouragement and care seems to have more eternal value than attending a meeting.

My faith is to be the guide for my life and many times that faith does not align with current cultural values. That faith is to be informed by His values above all others and reflect His truth. That faith is also to shape my character and be stamped on my priorities as evidenced by my words and my choices.

A few months ago, my husband and I were visiting our son’s church. During the pastor’s message, he quoted a line from Martin Luther that crystalizes the meaning of carpe diem for me. The quote is this: “There are only two days on my calendar, today and THAT DAY!”

As Luther’s words have stirred in my heart, I have looked at seizing the day a bit differently. What would He have me choose today that would most impact “THAT DAY”? The words have not sent me scurrying off to get involved in more religious activities, but rather slowed me down to reduce my activities to discover the important ones He would appoint for me “today”. That focus has pulled me to consider how often I foolishly can get caught up in the “cares of this life”.

His life, His ministry lived out on this earth, did not match the societal culture of the day or the religious culture of the day. He took time to be alone with His Father. He went off to spend time in community with His closest friends. He took time to notice a woman at the well, a blind beggar, a wee man up in a tree, and so many others missed by those aligned with the culture of the day. He was more present in the moment than anyone else who has walked the earth.

As a result, when I look at the glass cube on my desk that says carpe diem, I am reminded of Luther’s words as the Lord’s guidance for the day: “There are only two days on my calendar, today and THAT DAY!”